MY BOHO SECRET

Live like a free spirit

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Hello world! Am I really doing this?

hippie girl

I lost my sweet dog Murphy on May 15, 2021, one week after his 18th birthday. I had spent the previous 4 years helping him navigate his journey through canine dementia and made a promise to always keep his memory alive. Murphy was my best friend for 18 years and deserved nothing less.

So it’s no wonder that up until the morning of May 15, 2022 this Boho thing didn’t even exist for me.  I had other things to think about. In July 2021, 2 months after losing Murphy, I learned that I have some medical issues I wasn’t aware of. Out of nowhere I was no longer an innocent, magical person who would live forever in a wonderland world. In addition to mourning the loss of Murphy I began mourning the loss of innocence.

From mid-2021 to mid-2022 the year passed in a downward spiral of stops and starts, punctuated by confusion and a deep sense of sadness and disbelief about what was happening. Where did the innocence go and how can I find it again? Maybe I should leave New York and move to the mountains or the country or out of the country completely. Maybe I’ll find the innocence in India or Africa or Greece or France or on a hiking trail in the Appalachians. I read, I Googled, I researched but I couldn’t find a way to bring back those carefree years when the world was my oyster. Mr. Friedman, my Homeroom teacher at Ditmas JHS 62 in Brooklyn, NY, wrote in my yearbook the year I graduated, “The world is your oyster”, but Mr. Friedman failed to tell me how to find my oyster later in life when the innocence was lost.

Murphy knew, somehow he knew. I had built a website to honor his memory and as soon as it was completed something tugged at me. Something just wasn’t right. Maybe I should move the focus slightly in this direction or that direction. And so I did again and again until I woke up the morning of May 15, 2022, exactly one year after losing him, and knew that it had to be about me. I guess at some point during the early morning hours Murphy let me in on a secret, that it’s OK now and it’s time for me to focus on myself.

It was my turn now, my journey to experience and share and I knew I had Murphy’s blessing. I understood that to find the innocence I had to look deep within my soul and unlock secrets I don’t remember, and many I never even knew existed — secrets that I was sure would set me free. That morning I awoke with a sense of peace and purpose, secure in the fact that the best way I can honor Murphy’s memory is to find myself. And so the journey begins.

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2 Comments

  1. Jean Callaway

    May 23, 2022 at 4:38 am

    This wonderful page looks like it will be a fun journey of discovery.

    1. My Boho Secret

      May 29, 2022 at 7:45 am

      Thank you Jean, I’m so glad you’re sharing this journey with me!

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